Shannon. 24. Australia.
...Things that make me happy include..
~Final Fantasy series
~Kingdom Hearts series
~Cats (my Laicie mostly)
~Buffy the Vampire slayer
~John Green novels
...Nerdfighter for life...
...Seriously though just message me if you're lovely <3...
Look around your college classroom, spot the virgins.
See, this seems like a game until you skip over the girl with a short skirt and hair in front of her eyes because you heard last summer that she slept with like nineteen guys. You can’t see her hands, but they’re under the table, pulling a rosary through her fingers as she tries to wash the sin off her. She’s only ever kissed three people in her whole life and they’re all girls. She turned down the wrong guy and he told everyone she’s “a whore.” The label “slut” stuck to the bottom of her shoe and swallowed her up.
But that quiet girl who is always reading probably never touched someone else’s penis, you figure, because you don’t know that she goes home and strips down and pulls on tight black leather, you don’t know she’s got a set of whips that could make any set of knees quiver, you don’t know because she’s proud of what she does but she’s not stupid enough to let anyone know about it. She’s sexy, just not here, not where people judge.
See, the truth is: you have no idea who has lost their virginity, because it doesn’t change you. It doesn’t give you some kind of glow or superpower or stamp on your forehead. You know the feeling of waking up on your birthday and thinking “I don’t feel any older whatsoever”? That’s what maybe they’re all so afraid of you finding out: sex doesn’t change you. Sex doesn’t make you an animal, sex doesn’t suddenly make your relationship a million times more stable or intimate or romantic - it can’t fix what’s broken, although it can make the pain go away for a bit. Sex doesn’t really occur with eighty tea lights and a thick white rug. Sex is ugly and loud and frequently awkward, sex is excellent and breathtaking and when you wake up the next morning, you’re the exact same person. There’s not some magical connection with the person in bed beside you. Believe it or not, pregnancy isn’t some kind of punishment - but practice safe sex, get tested, don’t spread your germs around. They want to tell you, “Sex can ruin you” and I’ve heard that a lot as a little girl, that some boy would join me under my sheets and then dump me four days after, used, unhappy.
But I figured out that I’m not a fucking toy. Letting someone have sex with me is not letting them “use” me, because I’m not an object. My father said the issue lay in the fact “Men are insecure and need to know that they’re the best you ever had,” but I think that’s a steaming crock of absolute-wrong and if I didn’t tell the people I’m with how many others I’d slept beside, there would be literally no way for them to know my number, because I don’t rust, I don’t wear out, I don’t get bruised. I’m not a wilting fruit, I don’t go rotten.
But here’s the thing: some people connect sex and emotion. I don’t personally because I am probably secretly an ice storm in disguise, but I still respect my partner’s desires. If they’re the type to want love and sex to coincide, I let them. I don’t make fun, I don’t pull one-night-stands or friends-with-benefits, because it’s not their “reputation” I’m afraid for: it’s their heart I’m defending.
Here’s the thing: Instead of worrying about people’s “purity” and how it defines them as a person, worry instead about how you can protect other people’s emotions.
Because here’s the thing: look around your room and spot the virgins. Look harder. You can’t tell. Sex doesn’t alter people, it doesn’t make them act in a certain way nor dress in a certain manner. Sex and personality have nothing to do with each other. There’s a reason that virginity doesn’t show on someone’s face: because having sex doesn’t cause you to change.- "I lost my virginity to a boy I didn’t even love…" /// r.i.d (via i-blame-reagan)
Shoutout to people who ask you if you’re depressed then just say “cheer up”
OH WOW I’M CURED THANKS
Spending all day playing Animal Crossing, watching scary movies, and drinking in my bed might explain why I’m single.
I’m getting more than a little tired of being judged or looked down on for doing what I want to be happy.
Case 1: being single. People keep being all like “omg but you’re 24 and single what’s wrong with you” or whatever. Like can you not?? I’m not good in relationships and I don’t want to be in one right now. If Nic called me right now and asked me to be his girlfriend, I would. Wanna know why? Because my history shows that I just want what I can’t have, and once I get it, I don’t want it anymore. I’m that kind of dick. So if I were to be Nic’s girlfriend, I would then realise how much I hate him or he’d lose his appeal, and then we’d break up and it’d be over for real. For the moment though since he has some kind of childhood trauma, it’s just a convenient thing we have going right now and I’m OK with that.
I’m tired of my friends in relationships not understanding what I want. It’s ok that they want that more than freedom, people have different values and that’s OK. It makes it hard when I want to hang out though but they’re too invested in their relationships to care about their friendships. I suppose that’s what happens though when you settle down? Eh. Like. I understand and accept that, but they don’t seem to accept that I’m happy with being alone. It’s the “happy” part I think they have trouble with. I could have a partner right now if I chose to settle, and I won’t because that wouldn’t be fair to me or to the other person. I’m tired of people trying to make me feel bad for it.
Case 2: concert. So Lady Gaga is coming here on tour in August, sadly when I’ll be in NZ! EXCEPT for her last date, August 30 in Sydney. I want to go to this so bad, I’ve decided fuck it, I’m going alone. I need to stop being so fucking afraid of everything I do. There’s super cheap flights right now that I actually can’t look past, so it’s time to bite the bullet. Surely if anything I’ll enjoy the damn concert more alone because there won’t be anyone to judge me and I’ll be able to do what I goddamn want!
I just told this to Joyce, and was met with, “Oh, are you sure you’re happy with this decision?” UH BABES. You call yourself one of my best friends! You should know by now that if I’m not happy doing something, I won’t do it. This clearly relates back to being in a relationship also though :P Probably she thought I was making shit up to guilt her into changing her mind, but I’m 100% doing this. Going to book those cheap ass flights right now even. Hmph.
Argh anyway it’s just things like this. It makes me tired. So fucking tired. Let me be who I want to be ffs. UGH RANT OVER
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The Fault in Our Stars is going national! Shailene Woodley, Ansel Elgort, Nat Wolff, and John Green will be traveling the United States and they will visit the 10 states with the most notes on the corresponding post. Want to make sure they remember that they have fans outside of USA? Demand the stars come to Australia! Just like and reblog this GIF, and spread the word: each note on Tumblr equals a higher chance this post gets seen. The post that has the most votes by April 25 will receive a visit from The Fault in Our Stars tour, but what if one of them happened to be for a different country?
That’s the thing about Australia… It demands to be felt.